The Church Of Me
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Kissing in the churchyard, I know a righteous woman

Wednesday, August 22, 2007
ONE YEAR, NOT SIX

The obvious thing to say is that it doesn’t feel as though a full year has passed since we made it official at Marine Ices, although I suspect the next few months may feel like a couple of years in terms of everything I have to cram into them. But it is worth all the cramming - more than worth it. Last summer was the first summer in five years which I had been looking forward to rather than dreading; it was the turnaround which made all the five years of work here, and elsewhere, worth doing.

So I am not too concerned about Saturday; I acknowledge the loss but the important thing now is to continue to acknowledge the future – it is the only way to live. When we return to Oxford at the end of October there will two renewed people entering that city, rather than the pale, solitary ghost of hitherto.

Expressions of intimate gratitude are by necessity private, but all that really needs to be said here is that I’m listening to and loving music with the old passion, six years after I thought I could never bear listening to music again, that all which had previously constituted a shrine now lives and breathes once more, that life has been restored when once restoration seemed hopeless – and it is she, the noble she, who has made me complete again; I think it safe to say that this writer, in terms of a fully functioning human being and about-to-be happily married man, is open for business once more.

Thanks and love to the one who did not turn away and dared to kiss the scars so that they might heal even more soundly.


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